I shaved my legs for this?

Handcream vs.misc. oil based substances 11.03

I couldn’t help but repost this blog… memories…..

Written November 7, 2003

Handcream vs.misc. oil based substances There’s really no reason for the above subject title, I suppose I just wanted to catch your attention. I’m at work.. Feels like I’m always working now (even though we all know that’s not true) Hmm.. I was at the apartment again last night, eating too much food and watching many a movie. Carl came home about.. 9:00 or so, that was fun. I do love Carl. We were talking for a long time and I was trying to give advice. I’m not one for giving advice.. I don’t feel, I guess, qualified enough… But on occasion I do it and I do the best that I can. It was actually the simplest of things that I said last night… I told him to, “Just be happy. There’s no point in being sad.” And.. It’s funny because as cliché as it is, it really is true. I haven’t been happy lately.. for reasons unknown.. and when I told him to be happy.. a little light click in my head and I was like (Debbie you’re a hypocritical dumb-ass, if it’s so easy to be happy, why don’t you do it too?) Obviously being happy is easier said than done, but you just have to take it one day at a time and just laugh at all the dumb people who bring you down. Annnnd we talked more and then Carl wanted to go to bed at like midnight, but I kept him up till about 1:30 when finally he couldn’t take my constant gabbing anymore and threw his arms up in the air, screamed and passed out. Okay, perhaps a little dramatic.. we actually both fell asleep and I woke up and left his room. Then I watched part of another video and went to bed. Kim came home at 3:30 from her date so I woke up and talked.. I was half conscious however.. I have a vague recollection of what we talked about. Apparently I talk in my sleep.. a habit I haven’t had since I was a child and the other night I sat up, and said to Kim, “Huh, what, qua?” And went back to sleep and did it again. Kim thought I was just trying to annoy her, because I often say that to annoy her.. but no.. I was really sleeping. Even in my sleep I succeed in annoying her 5 months ago

Dreams 11.03

Written November 14, 2003
Dreams are funny.. Not always funny like ‘hahaha’ funny.. But funny because they can be either make your deep inner thoughts and desires come into light or fill your mind with terrors that you try so hard to keep hidden and avoid.

According to Merriam-Webber- dreams are defined as followed:
*A series of thoughts, images, or emotions occurring during sleep — compare REM.

I’ve always had “strange” dreams, but then again who’s to say what a strange dream really is. I’ve always dreamt in color, never black and white, at least not to my recollection. How my dreams work are- I think about something, either during the day or just before I sleep and the subject I thought about is always present in my dream, in one form or another. I can wake up from a dream and then fall right back into my dream with no effort- does this make me weird? I don’t think it does.. For me a dream is the one place where I can control my life- if I don’t agree with something I can switch it around, if something upsets me then I can wake up and choose a different setting. In dreams, being yourself, to be who you’ve always known you could be, is an effortless gift. Reality should be so wonderful as to handout that sort of free gift.

5 months ago

Always an event 9.04

Written September 17, 2004

…it’s a story about truth, justice, lotion and pennies..

(really it’s not as exciting as all that..)

**picture this**

It’s 1:00 am

It’s dark- scary- rustling in the trees, perhaps bears?

I had borrowed my moms car.. and i was just about to return the car.

I get into the car.. and i notice the light in the shift panel is still out..

highly irratating.. right?

so i smack it with my lotion bottle- (as any sane person would do in that situation, right?)

annnnnnd… nothing happened.. cause it wasn’t the fuse broken..

(but i’d learn that out later on..)

so i smacked it with my lotion bottle… and the whole inside imploded into the center island/shift gear area

and i was like.. hmm.. if arnault sees this at 5 in the morning on his way to work, he will literary shoot me

soo..

WWDD?

What would Debbie Do?

Well, of course i disassembled it!

Anyone who knows me knows I’d do that!

So apart came the dash board..the shift area.. cause its all connected together-so there are steps you hafta take to disassemble it.

So there’s the whole sa-bang- lying in various areas of the car.

and i spent about an hour and a half re constructing the inside.. putting a massive puzzle back together

Annnd so i got the lights working again and it’s all put together

and then i tried to fit the cup holder/ cig lighter plate type thing back in place

but the last mechanic working on the car was lazy so he shoved it in wrong, so i had to unplug the lighter/ adapter thingy to put it back in properly

(doing this all with the car on, cause i needed the lights)

so now i’m messing with active electricity

so i tried to unplug it.. but it was stuck. so i yanked it and a penny that was in the cup holder flew INTO the adapter port

ZAP! HUGE mo fo light show

so I was quickly motivated to work harder at disconnecting the plug

I unplugged it and got the penny out

but when it zapped it musta thrown this little bit of metal out of the socket

and so once I unplugged it and replugged it back in, it was no longer active -cause you need three metal slip covers for inside the plug and now there are only two..

but that’s an easy enough fix …

(And it was only after the fact that I found out I could’ve short-circutied the entire car with that spark-Oops! my bad…)

Hey, what do I know about cars?

Ah, the life of Debbie- never a dull moment.

Debbie* working hard for over 21 years to make things harder than they need to be*

5 months ago

Ah- Love ;) 9.04

Written September 18, 2004

Is it truly better to have “loved and lost”?
Is it better to disregard love because it’s not conventional, not proper, or maybe just because the consequences at loving are too risky?
Maybe it is.. Maybe we all should forget about that kind of love-the love that tells us to abandon everything we have, kill any doubts, the kind of passion that is so readily believed to be true in movies and books-the love you’d be willing to give up a part or even all of yourself for, even if that love was never meant to be returned to you.
But, if love does in fact mean feeling the slightest bit of happiness-however short a tap we’re given from Aphrodite’s little finger-and to that extent, maybe if it’s only a glimpse of what could, but won’t, last forever-it is worth it.
So, is it better to have loved and lost?
Absolutely.
I would take that choice a million times over if I had to chose.
Because love is a gift-and something we so rarely appreciate till it’s over.
Neglecting love is one of the only certain regrets in life.
Love isn’t just something to be wasted-no matter what repercussions may follow. Once it’s gone-you never forget it, you always need it, you may never feel anything like it again.

5 months ago

I shaved my legs for this?? 3.05

Written March 1, 2005 1:23 PM

Ever wish you could do something extraordinary? Break that glass box and go wild with whatever you desire? Ever do something so extraordinary that nothing you can do will ever match up to your previous success? Would that frighten you into hiding? What then, do you do? What would I do? I think about that all the time- going crazy- at least in the sense of becoming more actively ambitious. That would be extraordinary. Yesterday a man told me that my idle ambitions frighten him. Not because I dream big- but because my dreams are just that- only thoughts. I don’t strive to achieve greatness; I am seemingly content with mediocrity. I do this not because I fear failure, “failure is the opportunity to begin, this time more wisely.” So then what holds me back? Maybe my fear then is possibly having too much success- going too far ahead and leaving behind what I know now. Fearing the unknown is defiantly not uncommon. Even though I know that by not moving forward, I will enevitably still loose what I’ve got now anyway. I think it goes deeper than that though. My final thought is, it’s not the unknown I fear, it’s traveling there alone and staying lonely. Being alone is the only failure that I think I could not overcome.

5 months ago